There are many people who are in toxic relationships. Oftentimes, people assume these relationships involve physical abuse, cheating, or manipulative behavior. However, there are times when a toxic relationship is not as obvious. Sometimes, there are people in a marriage who are too controlling of a spouse. It can be hard to notice if you are the one being controlled, but it may be clear to other people. If you think you may have a spouse who is too controlling of you, then it's important to address it. Hopefully, things will be able to be resolved with some therapy, but you don't want to stay in a relationship like that. It can be detrimental to your health, and sometimes the controlling behavior can escalate to physical or mental abuse. Here are some signs that you have a controlling spouse.
Limiting Contact With Friends or Family
This is one of the biggest and perhaps most worrying signs of a controlling spouse. If your contact with friends and family is being limited, then you may need to get help. The thing is, this can kind of sneak up on you. This usually happens very gradually so you don't notice it happening. It may start off with your spouse saying that you spend too much time with your mom talking on the phone and not enough time with him or her. Maybe your spouse tells you he or she doesn't like your best friend and doesn't think you should hang out with him or her as much anymore. As time goes on, you may notice that your spouse starts looking at your call logs and limiting the amount of time you can speak with other people. You might also notice that he or she will ask you not to spend time on social media anymore. If you are starting to feel isolated because of the limits your spouse is putting on you, then you need to address the situation as soon as possible.
Conditional Love
Love should be unconditional. This means that your spouse loves you no matter what and vice versa. Perhaps your spouse is saying things to you that make his or her love for you feel conditional. This might be only showing you affection when you do something for him or her. It could be saying that you would look so much more attractive if you just got your hair cut or lost a few pounds. These comments are not only hurtful, but they are a sign that your spouse is being too controlling of you.
Keeping Track of Everything You Do
Part of a marriage is having trust. Without trust, not many marriages are going to last. Signs that your spouse may not trust you include the following:
- Insisting on having the passwords to your social media pages
- Reading through your text messages regularly
- Knowing where you are at all times
These are all signs of controlling behavior, especially if you have never given a reason for him or her to not trust you. However, it could be because he or she has been in a relationship before that did not end well due to infidelity or lack of trust. If your spouse doesn't trust you, then it's a good idea to try to figure out the reason why.
These are just a few of the many signs your spouse may be trying to control you. It's important to remember that control can often lead to abuse. While this isn't always the case, this should be reason enough to be aware of the signs. If you or someone you know is in a controlling relationship, then the situation needs to be addressed immediately to prevent the problem from escalating into something further.
Add Your Comment