So you've proposed, and your intended said "yes." You're ecstatic! (Naturally.) But now you've got some planning to do. And among making the arrangements, you and your future spouse need to figure out your wedding party- as in, how many people you're going to have, and who you will select. It might be simple if you've only got a small group of friends and just a sibling or two. However, if your social circles are rather large or if you've got a huge family, you might have some difficult decisions on your hands. Thankfully, some useful guidelines can help you decide who to include in your party.
Mull Over Your Choices Before You Ask
Assembling your wedding party involves some big decisions so, it's wise to take your time and avoid rushing. Think about every individual whom you'd like to include, and consider how the group of people will get on with each other as well. But don't delay for too long most planners advise choosing your group around 12 months in advance, to give both them and you enough time for planning.
The Number in Your Party Is Up to You
Although the size of your guest list and the formality of your affair might dictate how many attendants you choose, there's no set number by which you need to abide. Traditionally, groomsmen have also served as ushers and help seat guests, but there's no rule that says you must have them do this. Furthermore, keeping the numbers equal on both yours and your future spouse's side is helpful if you'll be having either side's attendants escorting.
Don't Be Afraid to Break From Tradition
Tradition used to specify that a bride would select a maid of honor, while the groom would choose a best man. Additionally, the bride chose female attendants while the groom on his side selected male attendants. But with more people breaking away from tradition, there's no reason why you can't select a woman as your honor attendant if you're a groom, or a man if you're a bride. This means that you'll need to pick attire that in some way differentiates each honor attendant from the rest of the group. Just make sure it's not the same as what you or your partner will be wearing during the ceremony.
OK So Who Should I Pick as My Honor Attendant?
For either side, you'll want to select honor attendants who have good manners, are dependable and display some level of prudence in their behavior. This is mainly because they might be responsible for helping with some of the proceedings such as addressing invitations, spreading the news about your wedding registry, toasting you as a new couple, signing the marriage license, holding the ring during the ceremony, and so forth. These should be people that you trust are also relatively punctual, good with organization and know what to say (and NOT to say) at crucial moments. Additionally, they should be folks that are regularly a part of your life- settling on someone with whom you've not been in contact with for a while could be awkward.
Your Special Day, Your Way
In modern times, you aren't selecting your attendants to help fight off romantic rivals or to prevent evil spirits from attacking you or your intended. However, you must make some good choices when selecting your wedding party. Remember that you're not bound by tradition, but it's ideal to choose folks who are responsible and well-mannered. Also, it helps to select your attendants early in your planning this makes it easier for both you and them. Picking your party wisely is one way to contribute to your happiness on your special day.
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