“I hate to admit it, but evidently I died.” Those words appeared in the opening paragraph of an obituary written by Columbus, Ohio, resident Jean E. Oddi. The 91-year-old woman, who passed away on February 20, left behind a lighthearted, sarcasm-filled death notice that was published by the Columbus Dispatch on February 22. While self-penned obituaries might seem a little unusual, they’ve become less uncommon. As more people take control of their final arrangements and with the presence of social media, “autobituaries” could become a more frequent occurrence.
Autobituaries Filled with Humor, Wit and a Personal Touch
The New York Daily News revealed in a March 2014 story that more individuals are leaving behind self-penned obituaries. One famous example is actor James Rebhorn, best known for his roles in the Showtime television series “Homeland” and the movies “Independence Day,” “My Cousin Vinny,” and “Meet the Parents.” His home church, St. Paul Lutheran in Jersey City, New Jersey, published his autobituary on its website shortly after his death. In “His Life, According to Jim,” the late actor expressed his love and admiration for his family, coworkers and teachers. “His children made him immensely proud,” he declared in one paragraph. “Their dedication to improving our species and making the world a better place gave him hope for the future.”
However, self-written death notices aren’t limited to the rich and famous. The trend is growing, partially due to the advent of social media. When Delaware resident Walter George Bruhl, Jr. died in March 2014, his self-written obituary was published in the Cape Gazette and then shared by his grandson on Facebook and Reddit. A Huffington Post write-up revealed that it went viral, mostly for its bits of sparkling wit. For instance, the former Marine, technician and businessman wrote: “His spirit was released from his worn-out shell of a body and is now exploring the universe.”
Leaving Your Own Words Behind
If you’re intrigued by the idea of penning your own obituary and want to give it a try, there are a few things you should keep in mind. In a December 2015 article, Huffington Post contributor Jim T. Miller recommended inquiring with your local newspaper for its death notice guidelines, adding that some publications only run obituaries from funeral homes or that are composed by their own staff. If it will run your autobituary, you may want to ask for a set of guidelines or consider using a template provided by a funeral home. Many local periodicals charge per word for obituaries and have specific word count guidelines, so it’s important to observe those as you write.
Furthermore, be sure to incorporate at least some basic facts about yourself before you start crafting your personalized wit on the page. Information such as your date and place of birth, loved ones you leave behind and relatives who preceded you in death are standard parts of obituaries. Additionally, you should include any high schools or colleges from which you graduated, your career accomplishments, your hobbies, any clubs to which you belonged and final instructions concerning flowers or charitable gifts in your name.
Set the Tone for Others to Remember Your Life
Depending on the likelihood of your final instructions being followed, your goodbye message may well find its way into the pages of your local daily journal, onto social media or as part of an online memorial.
Even if none of that happens, it’s a wonderful way to leave behind some enduring words for your family and friends. They certainly won’t forget what you’ve said, and it’s your opportunity to put your own spin on your life. Or, as Jean Oddi so eloquently put it, “Please remember this: never let the facts get in the way of a good story.”
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