One of the interesting things about marriage is when you marry your spouse, you are marrying into his or her family as well. This can be good or bad, depending on the family. Perhaps you have known the family for a long time and know that you will fit in perfectly. Unfortunately, this is not true for everyone. How do you deal with in-laws who do not want to accept you into their family? This can be a very difficult thing for both you and your spouse to deal with. You are likely feeling rejected and unsure of what to do, and your spouse is probably feeling torn between you and his or her family. There are some things you can do to help this situation.
Come to Terms With It
The fact is, you can try as hard as you want, but you cannot make your in-laws like you. Try to come to terms with it and deal with it the best you can. Sometimes, the harder you try to be accepted by them, the more they seem to hate you. Just be yourself, and they can take it or leave it. Try not to take it personally. That is often easier said than done, but there could be a large number of reasons they do not like you, and it may not even have to do with you. Come to terms with the fact that they do not seem to accept you, and don't let it become something you obsess over.
Realize It's Not as Important as You May Think
It may seem like the end of the world when the in-laws don't accept you, even after you and your partner are married. The truth is, it doesn't really matter. Your spouse obviously loves you and accepts you for who you are. In fact, your spouse loves you so much, he or she has chosen to spend the rest of his or her life with you. There's no rule that says everyone in your spouse's family has to like you. Focus on the fact that your spouse loves you and try not to let anything else matter.
Let Your Spouse Resolve Conflicts
In-laws who really don't like you may try to do things to tear the two of you apart. While this should never happen, and your spouse's family should simply accept the fact that your spouse is married and happy, it's something you should be prepared for. If your in-laws try to bring up conflicts, then let your spouse handle them. You arguing with them or fighting with them is only going to make things worse. This isn't to say you shouldn't defend yourself, however. If you ever find yourself alone in the room with them and they start attacking you, don't be afraid to stand up for yourself. While you should avoid conflict whenever possible, remind them that their son or daughter is married to you, and he or she would not like to hear the things they are saying about you.
Give It Time
Sometimes, it takes a while for in-laws to warm up to their son or daughter being married. This is especially true if it is their first child to get married. Try to give it time. It may not be you that they don't like, but the fact that their child is grown up and married now. Sometimes, they wind up taking it out on you, the spouse. After a while, you may see things start changing. It may take some patience on your part, but try to hold out hope that after a while, they will accept you.
If you are recently married and your in-laws don't seem to like you, try not to take it personally. Give it time, and hopefully, you will see change. If not, then let your spouse deal with any conflict that may arise.
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