How to Marry Someone
As an ordained minister, the idea of presiding over a marriage ceremony might bring up mixed emotions. Excitement, of course, but also anxiety. How do I make sure this goes right? If you’re feeling stressed about how to marry someone, we've put together some suggestions to help ground you and put your mind at ease.
Talk to the Couple
First, and most importantly, you’ll need to figure out what kind of wedding ceremony the couple envisions. What elements do they want included, and which parts would they rather skip? Are they writing their own vows, reciting poetry, performing the Haka? Understanding these small details will go a long way in helping you to craft an amazing ceremony.
Also get to know the couple on a personal level. Learn about their backstory, their values, their dreams. You will likely be expected to give a short introduction at the start of the service, and personal anecdotes – such as how the couple met and how they knew they were in love – can be great material to include.
Make a Plan
Write an outline for the ceremony. If there is going to be a wedding party with attendants such as bridesmaids or groomsmen, jot down when they will enter and exit and where they will stand. Some of them may participate in the ceremony. Make a plan for how they will move to the front and back to their spot (note: some couples will hire a wedding planner to handle this stuff).
Write down who will sing, say prayers, or do readings and when these things will occur. Pick an opportune moment for the couple to read their vows to one another, decide how best to conclude the proceedings, etc. If you’re feeling overwhelmed, don’t hesitate to check out our wedding script generator.
Rehearse
As the wedding officiant, you’ll of course need to practice going through the ceremony itself – otherwise you risk slipping up when it counts! Run through the script in front of a mirror or a close friend prior to the big day. Make note of any problem areas and focus extra practice time on those. The night before the wedding, go to bed early and get plenty of sleep. Nobody wants a half-awake officiant!
With all of this prep work done, on the day of the wedding you can relax, knowing that you are well-prepared to launch this couple on their new life together.
