William Dusenberry

Due to an article in the Wall St. Journal, in which the ULC’s founder, Bishop Kirby J Hensley, ordained 25,000 students, at Ohio St. University; because once ordained, if they were drafted, then sent to Viet Nam, they’d be chaplains, with the rank of Captain, and could minister, instead of any other options.

New Jersey

I’ve recently come out of retirement, so that I might spend the remainder of my productive life, being a minister/missionary, anywhere I go. Since then, I’ve ordained innumerable converts into ULC, — at least my denomination of the ULC, in which the only provable God, is nature’s God, as in Thomas Jefferson’s Declaration of Independence.

I assimilate any and all active, or passive references, to what’s commonly known as the “Golden Rule” into my ULC ministorial duties; and look forward to a wealthy benefactor, providing the funds, to construct the largest “Temple of Reason” ever, in the downtown area of Tulsa Oklahoma.

I insist that those to be wed, state what they’ve agreed to compromise to doing, in order to try to make their marriage work (I.e; toilet seat up or down, when not in use).

As my local doggie park, is where I usually encounter potential converts to ULC’ism, and where, more often than not, I pontificate to anyone hinting that they’d be receptive to such ULC pontificating, and, if it’s Sunday morning — such enables me to assume, that anyone, with whom I interact, has probably exhausted whatever interest they might have had, in any other places of appreciating nature (God) — besides a church, temple, Kingdom Hall, cathedral, or any other place where one is unable to see the sky.

I’d advise anyone I marry, to try to avoid having a child they can consider their own, until they’ve been married for five years (as recommended anthropologist Margaret Meade).